Subject: Me too!!

Dear lan,

We must have been very close, if not together. My NS intake number was 5218 and after being posted from the Royal Ulster Rifles in Bally mena, N.I., where I was offered the 'out' of either volunteering for the Para's or I could put myself down for the Military Police. The PSO was looking for 2 candidates for the Military Police out of an intake of 280.

I opted for the RMP and after 6 weeks of horrendous infantry training with one of the fastest marching steps in the British army I was near to death!

We were destined for Hong Kong with the possibility of onward posting to North Korea. During my time in Ireland the Korea bit was changed to a volunteer option.

At the end of another miserable ditch crawling day our sergeant called another miserable wretch and myself out and told us we had 30 minutes to pack as we had been selected to be posted to the RMP.Up to this stage the only Military Police I knew were stationed at the front gates!

So I returned to my quarters and slung most of my gear into my kit bag and had the other bits left on hangers which I could sling over my shoulder.

The 'Sarge' came in an surveyed my efforts. I will not repeat his language about my sex life and parentage. In short I learned that the RMP were based in Inkerman Barracks near Woking which was less than an hour from London where I lived. Joy!!

As you know, Inkerman was a women s lunatic asylum which had been closed down as being not fit for human occupation. Need I say more! 18 weeks of intense training taught us to hate everyone in the outside world.

Like yourself I was posted to Bad Rothenfelde which, being a health spa used by ex coal miners, was a happy experience.

I never had the luck to be posted to the Ski Resort of Bad Harzburg but weall yearned for the luck!

I fell out with Major Crombie when I started dating his secretary. Use. I was working in the office under Sgt Fern and got very close to her in the course of my duties, but NOT that close.

After one miserable exercise I was driving back with RSM Davies' clerk in a converted 15cwt office truck. This was so high it operated like a yacht and when I overtook a giant German truck on a wet road I was spun off the road and reversed into a tree at a good speed. The truck was wrecked and the RSM's clerk got a crack on the head.

We had been sent back to base early in order to transfer the office and I had followed the German road signs to Bielefeld. Unfortunately the Military Route had made a detour, and I was not on it.

Strangely we were found by the Sergeant with his Jeep and trailer who were doing the sign posting and they were also on the wrong road.

I was charged with some 'crime' and Major Crombie offered me a Courts Martial or taking his punishment. As I only had five weeks to do I took the decision that although he hated the sight of me I would accept his.

He reduced me to the rank of Private - was I the only private in the RCMP?

Being the lowest of the low I always got Night Duty on the desk. When I answered the telephone with 'Private Morley' I was always questioned.

Eventually back to Bielefeld prior to demob and on the morning of my departure I was re-promoted to L/C because Crombie didn't want a member of his unit going back to Woking in disgrace. So I had 15 minutes to get my stripes back on.

In the meantime I had been told that my TA Unit was the 10th Airborne so I ended up jumping out of aeroplanes anyway.

What a life.

22718703 L/Cpl Morley (Very Retired)

Friday 27th June 2003.